Missing Blogger Friends and Tips for Longevity?

After blogging for such a long time, five and a half years, you’ve seen a lot of things. The first one is your own blogging style and schedule changing over time. I mean, that happens right? Life experiences, general writing experience, and what blogging you can do over lead to your current style. The biggest one is making friends or at the very least acquaintances with bloggers who cover the same material. Sometimes you only know them through blogging and sometimes, you actually get to know them more then you expect. Even if you do not know their real name and only know them by their screen name, they are still familiar voices (through word or text) that you really like and possibly know more about.

Due to that anonymity, when they disappear, they really disappear. Not every blogger that one comes into contact will tell you why. Some say they have busy lives or have lost interest in blogging and then leave. Others just disappear without any explanation and it hurts due to that sense of community that was developed over time. The worst part is that there is nothing that can be done because all of this is through an online text and voice chats. Whatever the case, it makes making some online friendships with other people harder because you are unsure whether or not they will be around long enough. It sounds a bit harsh, but the life of a blogger, in general, is pretty short. It sounds like a good idea you one makes one and writes their first post but after a little bit, stop when they don’t feel like doing it because the up keep is hard. And you know what? There is nothing wrong with that either.

The worst part about all of this? A lot of the bloggers that have disappeared where the best at what they wrote about. I’m not kidding. Some of my biggest influences or people that got me to have any audience in the first place are gone now and it makes me feel sad knowing this fact. This all reminds me of a certain qoute of Lady Tomiko’s from From the New World that says she leads the village not because she is the strongest but because she’s been around long enough. That’s how I feel about me and my blogging. Well, with some luck with appearing at the right times and halfway decent writing. I have been around for five and a half years and I have seen a lot of things through internet time passing.

What is exciting though? When blogging friends come back. There is plenty of times when bloggers that disappeared for some reason make an effort to return to blogging because their lives aren’t as busy or they found the bug and love for it once again. It is always a joyous occasion when it happens. One blog post or a whole group of blog posts, or make a full return and yay! They did it. Still, that uncertainty exists. Not all that return stay around for that long. Some write a post that they want to return or announce they are return and then don’t afterwards. So, some excitement and then it’s gone again. So here is the thing, it’s so hard. The anonymity of the internet and time commitments lead to a lot of complicated situations especially when blogging isn’t a requirement ever. You know, unless you make money from it?

I guess I have some tips on all that stuff. Let’s get to some of them:


1) Blog For Yourself!

Remember, blog whatever you want to write about and not what is popular. Yes, you can gain an audience faster by writing episodic posts for some of the latest seasonal anime, but is that what you want to do? If it is, then fine! Do it! Be yourself. It may seem like sabotage at first, but the audience you do build will be more honest and interested in what you write about. Otherwise, write what you feel like is missing in the blogging sphere or works that you want to cover. Do not worry if other people have covered the same thing, just write if you have the energy to do it.

2) Blog With Friends

I’ve seen this around a little more recently, but work with other people when you create your blog. I can tell you right now how hard it is to blog by yourself multiple times a week. It requires putting yourself on a schedule so you can base your life around it in some ways. When you work with other bloggers, one person doesn’t have to post all the time. There seems to be a lot more leeway in how the blog is run and written and things. I am a little too prideful in what I do for my own good but if you can find some friends to help out, do it.

3) Don’t Expect Instant Success

I think a lot of new bloggers expect to gain an audience as soon as they start writing. The reality is that you are throwing pebble into the vast ocean of the internet. That is why the first option is important. If people don’t know if you are going to blog is coming out, then an audience isn’t going to instantly appear at the end when you start. If it helps, befriend other bloggers and you can build your own little community and work hard to advertise together. So with self motivation and help, it can happen.

4) Post When You Want

Yeah, what it says on the tin. Do not force yourself to post every day because that doesn’t work for everyone. Post when you feel like you’ve completed your post and you are satisfied here. After that, repeat when you feel like it. Don’t feel like you owe someone another post, just write on your blog when you have that drive and motivation. That’s it, really. That way, your motivation never stops and you can feed on the energy from one post to another. If you want to make a short cut for faster posts, then find a format that allows you the most minimum amount of time to write more.

5) Don’t apologize for not posting

After blogging for a while and you start announcing events, don’t apologize when they don’t turn out or you haven’t posted in a while. Just post when you feel like. I don’t like saying this out loud, but bloggers who write more apology posts or even a large fraction of their posts are apology posts for not posting enough kind of bother me a bit considering this fact. If you are too busy to not post, that’s fine. Everyone has busy lives and has things they want to achieve outside of just blogging. If blogging takes a backseat, it’s very understandable after all.

6) Have Fun

The goal of blogging should be to have fun doing it, whether it’s for writing random essays on anime or writing simple posts. If it feels like work and not a hobby anymore, then I can’t really much other then it might not be as fun anymore and the purpose being why one does it might be lost. So suggestions for a change? Take a break and discover your love for it again. If it’s there, then it’s there. If it’s not, then it’s ok to stop as well. I don’t think that anyone is holding you accountable if you do stop for a certain amount of time or forever.


So, none of these tips are perfect because it only comes from my point of view after all but this comes from everything that I’ve witnessed up to this point. I’ve had my own struggles with this blogging process too and I’ve felt and seen a lot of these things happening. Just know that in all of this blogging business, stopping is ok. If you suddenly lose interest, that’s fine. No one can blame you for doing what you want when you want to do it and no one should. What is left behind is some sadness for the community shrinking a bit but that’s blogging. It’s not as popular now as it used to be. People branch out to different mediums, stop, or stay. There is no singular answer for everyone in what they want to do. Just know that whatever you do, do it with passion and your 100%. That’s it. Thanks for stopping by.


17 comments

  1. Feel weird, but for me it’s already been 4 years. I think you, Irina and Karandi actually ended up being some important voices when I first started. There have definitely been a lot of times when I felt burnt out, but I’m glad I stuck with it, and even more glad that I’ve managed to meet so many awesome people in the community, including you😁. Cheers to continued inspiration and success!

    Liked by 4 people

  2. It is strange thinking of all the bloggers that have come and gone over the years though online communities always do have a lot of flux. Also, I know last year I ended up vanishing unexpectedly. It was odd because I didn’t mean to. I got busy, then I got sick and then I told myself I’d be back online in a week or so and I didn’t want to write a post about taking a break (because I wasn’t planning on it). And then that week stretched on and it ended up being nearly the whole of 2020 (from about March on) that I just wasn’t really online and 2020 was just a really hard year (for so many people). But I think I get why some people just disappear and we don’t see them again and they don’t let us know that. They weren’t planning it and then it is hard to come back after an extended absence.
    That said, I’m very grateful for the people who remain in the community and for the newcomers who bring in fresh perspectives.

    Liked by 6 people

    1. I’m glad you came back to join us once again. I missed you but I’m also glad you took that break too and found some time to relax as well.

      Like

  3. All good advice. It’s important to remember that writing is hard work — when I’ve worked all day it’s nearly impossible for me to write anything because I’m mentally exhausted. You need enough creative energy to make something worth reading in my experience, and that can take some time.

    Respect to everyone who puts themselves out there like this. I’m sad when I see a post I really like while searching some subject and then find that they haven’t posted in the last three years. But I completely understand why blog writers drop off. It’s all about doing it for yourself, and to hell with people who tell you you have to do it their way.(unless you’re explicitly just trying to drive business and focusing on SEO.)

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I feel the same way. I’m a late night person so that’s where I get my creative energy, but sometimes I just write really short posts because that’s just so I have. It really does take a lot of thought and work to keep going so no shame on anyone.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Great post. Even in the short amount of time I’ve been a part of the community, I’ve seen it happen. It is really sad, but I get that it’s not for everyone. Thankfully, I don’t see myself stopping anytime in the near future, but I think that’s largely because I knew what expectations to have, and as you said, I do this for myself because I enjoy it. I just hope in the future we can all help each other out, so we don’t lose as many.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah, it’s amazing how much quick turn arounds can be and that’s all fine. It’s perfectly understandable. I hope you stick around and we can help each other as well somehow.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Yeah I definitely agree on the apologizing part. I feel like it wouldn’t come across well if I said it on one of the posts so I never do, but I agree that apologies are really not needed if you end up missing a day or two or even months. Stuff happens irl and it can happen really unpredictably.

    It is cool to see a blogger return from oblivion so to speak. One blog I followed stopped posting for 3-4 years and suddenly came back. (They vanished again shortly after but it was still cool to see the return)

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I like the advice you’ve posted here.
    As far as voices who have gone silent… You know, that gets harder as time goes on. You’re right when you talk about the reasons people choose not to post anymore, but it’s still sad.
    I remember sites like The Inskihole or #moe404. Such distinctive voices, now gone.
    Well, I suppose it’s better they published at all. At least we got to enjoy their perspective while it was there.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Lol I am guilty as charged for doing the disappearing act. Even though for a long time I wanted to come back but i also felt guilty for the longest time doing it. I still feel the guilt now aha, but I think it’s good advice that one should only be blogging for yourself and your own goals etc. Its the most sustainable way to do it 😉

    Having said that though, when I came back recently I did realize the blogging community has shrunk. I guess it’s inevitable as there are also many other forms of distractions and people don’t write or read as much anyway on top of the tumultuous events of last year and people generally being busier. We live in transformative times haha.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s ok, don’t worry about it :). Don’t feel guilty at all because I am glad that you are back!

      Yeah the community has gone through some expansion and depressions because new bloggers do come in but not as often as I would like i suppose. It’s hard.

      Liked by 1 person

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